Perspective check

At one time in my life I was so relevant that people wanted me dead,  and they did their best to make that come to pass.

I sometimes lose my perspective on life,  and I find that thankfully someone or something usually reaches out to remind me and set me straight.

Today it was a leader I will always look up to,  and I bet he doesn't even know what he did.

He is once again, and in fact has never ceased to be, in the situation I mention above. He is a highly relevant, trained, and motivated leader. He is engaged in doing good, and making things right in all corners of the world at the behest of our great nation.

Today, as I sat in a parking lot in Denver, CO fresh into my new job at a corporate office of a telecommunications company, wondering what I was getting into, and just generally over-thinking my life choices. This man, this leader, took a moment from his day and let me know he was in fact thinking of me. He said he was thinking of 12 years ago tonight when we were under SCUD attack in Kuwait, and that he hoped I was doing well.

Wow…

The parking lot faded away…

12 years….

They were trying to kill me, him, all of us. We were relevant, alive, dashing to don our MOPP gear, then over and over running to the bunker and waiting.

Hearing the patriot battery fire nearby, then waiting…. Then BOOM…. Then waiting…. And waiting…. Using our M256A1 kits to see what we could see.

It became mundane over the next 2-3 days… so much so that my entire tent slept through one air raid siren and giant voice… never even roused. Our PL came through on her way back to her tent after the all-clear and threw our tent door open… banging loudly… and yelled “where the hell were you guys… I was worried about you” we all shot bolt upright in our racks… My mouth was moving before I could stop it…” So why didn’t you get us on the way to the bunker, why did you wait until the all-clear to get us???” She was not amused. I was not amused. There was no amusement. The door slowly slid shut. The only sound was that of the string holding the water bottle rubbing through the wooden frame…. Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz…. Followed by the dull, quiet thud of the plywood door as it met it’s frame. We never spoke of it again.

All of this flashed through my mind… as I sat in this rental truck… in the parking lot… where I’m so irrelevant that no one even notices me.

However, today I was reminded that at one point in my life… I was relevant, people wanted me dead,  and some people will never experience that.

I roam

I am destined to roam

A weapon at my side


What home can I find here?

Alaska Airlines 1st rate service and employees

To whom it may concern,
During a recent flight from Billings to Portland, I had an opportunity to experience something rare these days. Excellent customer service.
Your team members Salvatore and Melanie in the cabin crew were exceptional. From the start of our boarding process and safety briefing, Salvatore brought gentle humor and a very human approach to his briefing. It was refreshing to hear it given in the same tone as you would normally talk with someone rather than a chore or reading a dusty script.
Furthermore, while our flight was in route, we encountered rough air on several occasions. On one such bump, a passenger toward the rear of the aircraft made use of your air sick bags, or rather, should have, but didn’t. Both Salvatore and Melanie reacted professionally and with the utmost care. They cleaned things up, and made sure the passenger was OK.
As the rough air continued, so did their professionalism. They did have two very short opportunities to make quick runs through the cabin with the beverage cart. They were quick, clear, and managed to take care of the group prior to the seatbelt sign coming back on.
As the flight drew to a close we were again treated to a rendition of your Alaska Airlines Visa card pitch as only Salvatore could give it. I would attempt to regale you with it, but it would pail in comparison. Had I not already been carrying my own Alaska Airlines card, I would have grabbed an application forthright.
This cabin crew reflects great credit upon your company as a whole, their respective teams, and your training team. Thank you, and please do pass along my thanks to both Salvatore and Melanie!

Relationships as windows

The other day I grew a year older, and someone who I am connected to through a loss we both felt in very different ways sent me a nice message. It made me stop, yet again and think of the great person we both shared a loss for.

I thought of this and wanted to share it here...

Relationships are windows in our life and heart.
I see a large white open room, big like your schools gym when you were little.
But all white, and quiet and clean.
It's impossibly tall, and has windows all over it. As we look around the room we see that the windows all have different views of out them.
It's incongrous and disorienting, but not unpleasant just the same.
As we look at each window we know, just know that each of them is a relationship we have with someone in our life.
Some are closed and locked against the storm, others are just dusty and rusty with lack of use.
Some are near, and opened, and we see that one in perticular makes us feel for the one we lost.
We recall that in the last this window was full of sun, and joy, and we could hear... no... actually feel joy coming through it.
But now it's differnet, it has been since he was lost.
Initally, some of us closed that window, against the storm and rain and cold.
She couldn't, she had opened that window and hapily given up the ability to close it years ago.
She kept it opened through the storms, and rain, because she knew that there would always be sun, and joy eventually.
She stood at this window happily for years.
Now since he has gone, she still keeps it opened.
She stood there in the rain and cold that chilled her to the bone over the last year and more.
She wouldn't leave... she needed to feel the loss, the pain.
And from time to time, the sun would come out, and the warm wind would blow the curtans in that loveley lazy way a summer breeze does.
She lives for these times.
As time went on, the sun stayed longer, and the breeze kept it's warmpth through the nights.
It was getting better.
She did notice that while the storms had passed, that now too, even the sun began to seem somehow hazy, and distant... but not in a painfull or sad way, rather in a comfortable and reassuring way.
It was many months before she relized she was no longer standing directly at the window, but was beginning to look at, and indeed through others again.
Her children could be heard through some of them, and close friends through others.
She looked back, frightend for just a moment that the window of her love would be gone, or closed, or something terrible.
But it was there, as she rememberd it, opened, with a warm sunny breeze.
She had weatherd the worst, and could now feel free again to walk around the room, knowing that she could always come back when she wanted... or needed to.


We all have these windows,
we choose which ones to open, and when. Some open to sun, and others to storm and rain. Sometimes we do what others call silly or even morose, and stand there with the rain coming in the window, and we just let it come in. We stand in the puddle, getting chilled to the bone, just as she had, but still we can't leave. We won't leave. Then sometimes the storm lifts, and we see sun, and beauty, and a warm breeze moves the curtains lazily, and we bask in this joy.

When we loose someone dear to us, I imagine we walk close to the window initally uppon hearing the news and gaze at it in a new way, seeing the small bits of paint missing, and the notes we have stuck to it in the past, or in some cases the cobwebs across it,  All in a new light. the light of loss.
It starts as a cold blue light, but over time can become warm again.

Opening these windows is taking a chance, so some of us keep them locked up, closed, we hope it protects us, but really we just isolate ourselves.
I urge us all to open them, and try it out.
See just what adventures await us.
It won't always be sun, but remember,
It can't rain all the time.

It drives me

I'm going to add this personal post to a mostly vanilla web-page. Funny as I type this, I'm thinking it's a good analogy for what I'm about to discuss.

Some songs I keep around be cause they make me happy, some because they make me remember. The one I'll share with you today does something I'm going to try to explain, but I may fail miserably. Wish me luck.

The song: Head Downby Nine Inch Nails

First I'll try to explain it, then I may share along with the lyrics what is going on in my head as I listen to the song.

The two very different sounds during the song play at picking the edges of a scab I don't think is ready to come off. Sometimes I really do wonder if all of this is real. What do I mean by this? Well... During my deployments I knew in no uncertain terms that it was VERY real. there were zero layers of bullshit. War, is as real as life can be. Here, and now, as I listen to this song while running on a treadmill at a hotel in Rawlins, WY I get goosebumps across my sweating body as I really wonder just what the hell I'm doing here. As the song progresses, there are two very opposing sounds. Chaos, and metallic tones of something dirty, gritty, and raw. While in the refrain a silky soft melody settles in as we ask ourselves if this is real...

Now, all that being said, there is a silver lining. There are a few, OK, three people who know either some of the real me, or in the case of one, all of me.

This is new

This is real

I have never been able to be this honest with someone in my past.

This has given me hope that the scab I mention may some day fall away on it's own

This has given me hope that even if it doesn't, that's OK, and I'm OK.

So it's a tough song to listen to. I only listen while running, and it drives me. I'm not sure why, but it does. I choose to keep it on my playlist for the same reason we tongue a sore tooth. It hurts, but for some reason, we like that, even crave it once in a while.

So as I ran on that treadmill, I thought, I wonder if this would be helpful for anyone. Or perhaps helpful for me to share. Hell I dunno, but why not.

Something I read the other day just popped into my head as I'm finishing this up, something like this:

If you act like you, then you will meet and be with people who like YOU. Not a fake idea of you, or some image of you, but actually YOU.

Great advice I think, and for some reason in today's world hard advice to follow.

A chapter closes

I have lived mostly in WI for my entire life. Don't get me wrong, I travel a lot, and have been overseas, but I always wound up back in WI.

Tomorrow that changes. I will wake up early, unplug my RV, hitch up my car, and drive out of Wisconsin. I'm headed to Montana, my new job, new area, new challenges, new fun, and all new adventures.

I hesitate to say home. As I have for several years. I do have hope though. Hope that I'm getting closer to whatever it is I'm looking for. I do have some fear, a move, this far, at this time of year, can be daunting. Particularly when your driving your home there. However I also have help. That's a great feeling. So it is with a bitter sweet excitement on my mind that I write this note.

One chapter closes, a new one begins, unwritten, with no boundary as of yet. No telling what may happen, or what hilarity will ensue. I like that. I like to feel the tangible excitement, even adrenalin. I know as I shift into drive tomorrow morning... my heart will be pounding in my ears with the recognition of what's happening. The gravity of it all... and I'm glad.

I will never look back and say, I wish I had given that a try.

never.

A new windshield... a fresh look

This Blog has taken several turns through the years.

First It was about my 2nd Deployment to Iraq. Where it was from my windshield in convoys and during missions.

Eventually when I came home it moved on to being about my job and the travels that it took me on. Still a windshield of sorts.

A 3rd deployment saw my blog shut down for safety due to our mission. The windshield went dark.

After I came home again I used it again as mostly a place to talk about my travels at work... interspersed with some of my personal feelings and thoughts.

Now a new chapter is beginning, and yet again the title is quite appropriate.

I've been struggling with not feeling like anything or anywhere is home since I left Taji, Iraq.

I can see that now... but still not very clearly.

More on the why's and pluming the depths later... for now:

I'm moving from my comfortable 2BR condo on a golf course into a 34 ft class A motor home.

Life through my windshield... here it comes.

This chapter is a change, a fresh turn. It's an adventure, I need to take it while I can, and I do need it. I"m not fully aware of the why's yet, but I"m hoping that becomes clear along the way.

More to follow... for now this should serve as a "header" if you will, a post that turns the page... 

Here we go...

This World is Only Illusion... Trying to Change You

This World is Only Illusion... Trying to Change You

I know some folks it has managed to change. It sometimes looks like a good thing, some times it feels so right... but in the end the illusion is swept away and only the reality of the decisions they made are left.

This is one such story.

I met a man. I didn't want to meet him. He was going to be in my way you see. I had just returned from my third tour in Iraq. I was dealing in a world without layers of bullshit, without layers of illusion. I was transitioning back into my civilian job where I knew all of these layers existed in spades. I had previously not had a direct supervisor. I had reported directly to a distant but amazing manager. I was happy. This guy was going to get in my way. Just one more layer of control and confusion I would have to deal with.

Initially upon meeting him, I was sure I had been correct to worry. He was so formal. He re-iterated the simplest of points over and over again.  Belaboring a point so simple as dress code to death. I was really worried this was going to make my job unbearable.

As time went on (not much really) I started to notice something... This "guy" was actually pretty damn smart. He was quick, attentive, and dare I say real? This was strange. He didn't deal in layers. He wanted, no actually expected the reality of it all. He was a layer of protection from the corporate mess, not an addition to it.

As we worked more closely together I began to find that I could learn a lot from him. Some simple things, organization items, plan of action, simple type stuff, but also some pretty amazing big picture items. He knew how to actually lead, not manage. I was taken aback... this kind of leadership belonged in the military, but I was highly unaccustomed to it in the civilian world.

Before long I found myself thinking of this "middle man" as a mentor, I looked up to him. I trusted his decisions, I would seek out his thoughts and input in my own career decisions. I also realized something else. He cared. Not the typical paper-thin caring you get from stuffed shirts with no backing or feeling. Rather a true, honest, and tough caring. I was AMAZED. At one point we both laughed as we discussed our first meeting, and how serious it seemed at the time, versus how laughable it was now.

Eventually he moved on in his path, and I in mine, but we kept in touch. I continued to learn from this man well after we no longer worked for the same company.
While he was a supervisor, colleague, and mentor, he was also much more.

He was a friend.

In case you didn't catch it, this is not a word I toss about with the greatest of ease. I have hundreds of acquaintances  co-workers, and business partners, but my number of friends can be counted on one hand. Literally.

Something happened to this man. The illusion... it got to him... maybe he let it in... maybe he fought long and hard to fight it.. he didn't know how to ask for help... it won.

This man deserved so much more. He should have had someone who he could go to. Someone who knew how much he was in pain. He didn't think he could... and that was the illusion.

He couldn't see through the layers of pain and confusion clouding his vision. It was so thick he couldn't make out his family. His wife, his wonderful children. They were all so far away. Blurry in the distance. Unmoving, and worse yet, unmoved.
He couldn't make out those of us who cared back. While he responded with smiles, jokes, and jovial quips, all the while he was hiding his pain. The world had pulled him into a dark corner... alone... and without hope.

In the illusion he could only see one way out... one clearing... one end.

He took this path, this illusion of peace, but could not see what it would do, nor who it would hurt.

Now all that is left is the void. The consequences of a decision made in the fog of this damn cold world.

You, sir, deserved better.

I'm sorry I wasn't louder or closer than the fog.
I'm sorry for your family who will live without you now.
I'm sorry for others who feel this loss as well.

I choose to remember you before the illusion took hold of you.
While you were a bright light in the world.
Smiling that smile, and helping those you met in any way you could.
While you knocked down layers of bullshit to have a very REAL life with all who you touched.
You are missed... and will always be.

In memory of KP, a traveler, now on the eternal road.

Room walk through: Stoney Creek Inn of Rothschild, WI

What I can say:
Thin walls, but great decor, friendly staff, and reasonable prices. The place makes up for the thinner walls on most of my stays here, and if there is a noise issue, the staff is quick to fix the problem.

Room walk through: Holiday Inn Express in Chippewa Falls, WI

What I can say:
They have a helpful staff, but are somewhat overpriced for the area in my opinion.
The rooms are clean, and updated.

Room Walk through: Best Western in Escanaba, MI

What I can say:
Paper thin walls, Decent TV, Decent Internet, Front counter staff is a bit short with you at check in. No explanation of breakfast, etc...

Last weeks trip: Denver, CO

Last week saw me in Denver, CO


I flew on Southwest from MKE to DEN

The early morning flight was uneventful with decent customer service.

Initially I did not rent a car.


I stayed at the LaQuinta in the Denver Tech area:

$65▼La Quinta Inn & Suites Denver TechCentermore info‎

7077 South Clinton St Greenwood Village, CO 80112 (303) 649-9969 lq.com‎  3 reviews

What I can say:
The rooms aren't bad, the staff is however a little lack luster overall. Not much personal attention to the guests, if any at all. You can tell the hotel is in need of a re-fresh as far as overall upkeep. The internet is painfully slow everywhere but the lobby. The in room TV's are great, with a good TV Guide on board, and even some calming screen savers on them.
All in all three of five stars if you ask me.


Later on, I picked up a dodge Charger rental from this enterprise location in a nearby hotel:

Enterprise Rent-A-Carmore info‎

7801 East Orchard Road Greenwood Village, CO 80111 (303) 221-0750 enterprise.com‎ Write a review

I already have a review of this car located here.


Some places I went for grub:
First off my ABSOLUTE FAVORITE STEAK HOUSE IN THE WORLD:

Ted's Montana Grillmore info‎

5370 Greenwood Plaza Boulevard Greenwood Village, CO 80111 (303) 771-3038 tedsmontanagrill.com‎ 19 ZAGAT ·  7 reviews

Street view

We also sampled some down home BBQ:

Dickey's Barbecue Restaurants, Incmore info‎

10230 East Arapahoe Road Centennial, CO 80112 (303) 792-2444 dickeys.com‎  9 reviews

Street view

I also took a quick run before a storm blew in from the mountains and cut it short ( I was going for three miles)

My return flight was early squirly Friday also on Southwest, however this time around we were about 10min late. Our flight attendant was quite a joker, really making the safety briefing fun, and a lot less mundane.

Encountered some turbulence over MN due to some storms, but we arrived about 10min late in MKE and all was well.

Car Review: Kia Soul

Last week I had a KIA Soul for a long trip to the UP (Upper Michigan).
MSRP: $13,900 Starting $18,145 as tested
MPG: 29-36

My trip took me 750 Miles in a mix of weather from heavy storms and 65F to Sunny and 90F. I was able to manage an average MPG of 30.

First off let's not go much further until we discuss this vehicles first decision maker. The styling. If you hate it, no reason to read further, as it's a love / hate thing. If you don't hate it, lets look deeper that that mug.

Acceleration

In this department, it's ample. I was able to pass when needed without too much worry. The acceleration was ample, and smooth throughout the power band. I didn't detect the dreaded "dead" spots some new small vehicles are showing. Good job KIA.

Handling

Again, nicely done. Don't get me wrong, it's not going to turn on a dime without some groaning. It's not a sports car you know. But it's size does give it the ability to "buzz" around town and corners smoothly and quickly.

Versatility

Again scoring high on this mark. The rear fold down seats are easy to work with, and the rear cargo area is nice and wide. Plenty of room for work stuff (as you can see here). 

Comfort & Gadgets:

Up front you'll find ample space for all of your gear, and plenty of charging and aux inputs for the stereo. My unit also had blue-tooth which was a breeze to setup.

 I was prepared for the seats to be annoying and uncomfortable on such a long drive, however I was surprised with how I felt five hours in. Still doing well, not really needing a break other than to stretch out, no annoying pains or sore spots. The interior is what I would call responsive and well laid out.

I'm actually currently in the market for a smallish 20K or less new ride with good MPG, a bit of fun, and decent looks. I have to admit about half way through the week I started asking myself if the looks were an issue or not. It was growing on me.

The layout of the dash is also appealing, and simple.

The glove box is ample. 

simple well placed controls.

Front door arrangement allows for medium but not large water bottles etc...

The rear door layout. (Same story with the water bottles)

In summary:

$:18,145

MPG: 30

Power Plant: I-4 DOHC w/138-164 HP & 123-148 Torque

Cabin noise: 80dB at 60 MPH

We like:

• Zippy feel & low end acceleration
• Loads of nooks to store my stuff
• ample room

Not so great:

• A bit much cabin noise
• Style (for me)
• The large fake "speaker" in the middle of the dash.

Over all I'd give it a four out of five. Surprisingly good KIA!

Memorial Day: What today is about

I just want to be clear here
Memorial day is about honoring those who gave all. So please today of all days, don't thank me for my service. Instead, thank those who didn't make it back, and their families and loved ones.

Take a moment to look at those who gave you the freedom we all sometimes take for granted and thank them in your own way.
Iraq:
http://icasualties.org/Iraq/Fatalities.aspx
Afghanistan:
http://icasualties.org/OEF/Fatalities.aspx

One such man:
Paul R Syverson III

We served together for a short time, however, I will never forget.

Car Spy Photos: Ford C-Max 5 and 3 Door & Fiesta based SUV or Escape?

During a recent vacation to Colorado Springs, we took a drive up Pikes Peak for some amazing views. The total elevation is just over 14,000 ft. and it is some times used by car makers for high altitude testing on vehicles. I was in luck, as Ford had chosen the same day to test five upcoming models!

Here are the photos (All copyright of Travis Taylor)

First the group as a whole:

So you can see right off the bat that were looking at three small cars (C-Max) and two small SUV's (new or next Escape)

So let's take a closer look at the ones we know, the C-Max:

So, what's interesting about this little guy? How about the sliding rear door? That would be a new idea!

Upon closer inspection, I also noted that two of the vehicles had air hose like connectors protruding from the rear end. I'm not sure if this points to propane power, or something else entirely.

For now, at least in the testing phase, you can see that the interior is stock Fiesta or Focus, albeit right hand drive on this one. I get a kick out of the sign stating that the airbag is not working.

On this model, we can see it's a coupe, with rear hatch, and there defiantly hiding something on the top edge of the hatch... new spoiler design?

You can see most of the front fascia is plum fake, catching only a glimpse of the underpinnings through the fog light hole.

This is a slightly better shot of the runner for the sliding rear door.

Alright, now let's move on to this new to me small SUV:

You can see the air or propane connector coming out of the undercarriage on this one again. Also just to the upper right of the spare is a gap in the body work that looks intentional, not sure of the purpose though.

You can see here pretty clearly here the matching interior.

I didn't notice it at the time but just to the bottom left of the main grill is a strange opening can't guess at its possible use.

Again with the strange air or propane hook up, and no tail pipe, must be propane then. Also badge placement would indicate that they actually plan on having the spare mounted on the rear as it is here.

This one at least appears to be a manual with a five speed, also takes regular fuel.

We also managed a shot of them on their descent.

So what do we know?

• C-Max is being tested 3 and 5 door.
• A possible new small SUV or a redesign on the Escape
• They can handle 14,000 ft of elevation.

If you would like to re-post or publish these photos you must first contact me at: miltrucker@gmail.com

-Thank you.

St Louis Arch Looking West

Quite a view is offered by the St Louis Archway.

Car Review: Dodge Charger

We took this Dodge Charger out for a week long spin during a little vacation time. (finally)

The Chargers page can be found here.

It's models range in price from 25K ish to 47K ish. As tested was around 26K (some options included)

We ran it 684 miles and managed to return an average of 28.6 MPG.

Now, before I move on further, I MUST explain that the MPG would have been higher (something like 30) however we did some serious mountain climbing (Pikes Peek at 14,000 FT elevation) which I'm sure takes things out of the "norm".

Here is a rough map of our travels:

We wanted a full size car, that would be comfortable so how did it do on a week long trip?

In short quite well.

Upon pick up and heading out of the Denver airport the first thing I noted was again noise level. This time it was the lack of noise. My Handy App tells me that at 75MPH the cabin was experiencing 70dB of road noise. Very noticeably quiet. 

Acceleration was smooth, although at times it seemed a little under-powered, I found that I simply needed to be a little more liberal with my foot. It is a lot of car to move for the 3.6L 292HP but again, if you put your foot into it, the little 6 does perform well.

Design and looks, let's be short and sweet here, its looks are aggressive and bold. You either love it's nose, and taillights or you hate them. I find the design AMAZING! They took the last iteration of body style and cranked it up to eleven.

Room? Well it's ample. plenty of luggage space.

There are also some nice touches. In the trunk on both sides, lights and hooks for bags.

The lights don't stop there, on the underside of each door there is a similar light. Also of note, is the smart design of the door which allows for large water bottle storage in each door.

(something very lacking in the Jeep Compass)

 Interior impressions, great job! I already mentioned the quiet nature of the cabin, however it doesn't stop there. The instrument panel is really useful, and has plenty of menu options and display settings to tweak  for us tech types.

The center console is simple and well thought out. The Uconnect Touch Media Center screen is capable and smart. Not to much, not boring either. I'm not 100% sold on the CD placement being so much lower than the media center, but I could live with it. Climate control is also simple, but the controls have a good feel when used, and don't have the cheap fall apart feeling of the past. More upgraded models will have temperature control modules. This model also had push button start with a key fob you just keep in your pocket. I have to say, it's something I enjoyed and got very used to. When we dropped it off, I nearly forgot I had the key in my pocket.

Inside of the arm rest area you can see it's ample space, good storage, and as you can see 12V charger, and iPod, and line in options as well.

This model had auto lights, as seen here.

The rear seats had ample leg and head room and were actually comfortable as well.

There was also a pull down arm rest / cup holder in the back seat.

Additionally, the rear seats get another 12V power plug and some vents.

In summary:

$: 26,000.00

MPG: 28.6

Power Plant: 3.6L V6

Cabin noise: 70dB at 75MPH

We like:

• Quiet cabin
• great design inside and out
• ample room

Not so great:

• A little sluggish until you put your foot down
• CD tray placement
• Slight thinning of trunk space due to wheel wells

Over all I'd give it a four out of five. Good job Dodge, keep it up!